Bullying is a Fear Based Behavior

It’s time for all of our students to go back to school. Some schools opened last week. Here on Rosebud our schools are open this week, so watch out for students getting on and off the bus.

Many of our students start out a new school year with a ton of enthusiasm. For some of them, that enthusiasm will last all year. But for others the enthusiasm soon turns into dread because of bullying. There are some students who will not finish the year because of other students who bully.

Teachers, administrators and support staff need to be aware of what is going on in their schools. When a student is terrorized by another student they often do not tell anyone because they choose not to create any more trauma for themselves. Many parents will seek out a teacher or administrator to inform them of incidents of bullying. Oftentimes, the excuse offered by the teacher or administrator is “he/she never said anything to me about being bothered by a bully.”

I am not a teacher, nor am I an administrator. Still, I believe that if you choose to go into a career which involves helping elementary, middle and high school students become educated you have to accept that part of your job is keeping our young people safe while they are on school grounds. If this means hiring more staff to make sure everyone is safe while they are at school well please hire more staff.

For two years in a row I have had family members suffer bullying while they were trying to learn at school. Our experience was the teachers and administrators claimed ignorance about what was going on because no one said anything.

Many people employed by the schools have been there for a while. Most should know how their students really behave by now. Staff must know which students are mean. They should also know which students will choose not to stand up for themselves – these are the young people being are targeted by the big bad bully.

Consequently, bullying isn’t a behavior limited to students. There are teachers, administrators, support staff and even school board members who are bullying students. They will even bully parents!

A bully falsely believes he/she has gained the respect of the people they are picking on. But, they are mistaken in feeling it is respect making people do what they want them to do. Actually, it is really the opposite. People fear a bully so they do what the bully wants. Fear has absolutely nothing to do with respect.

No bully deserves respect. Respect is on the level of love. Fear is a dark emotion, quite the opposite of love. A bully who believes they are respected is a fool.

We always get back everything we hand out. When you are deliberately bullying someone – a classmate, your student, an employee or a coworker – a bigger bully will surely appear in your life to give you an equal dose of fear.